आखिरी चाहत Aakhiri Chahat (Last Wish)

nayan · Aakhiri Chahat - Poem recitation by Nayan

ऐ खुदा

यह मुझको बता,

क्या किया था मैंने

कि यह वरदान

तूने मुझको दिया,

कि यहां आ गए हम,

कि यहां आ गए हम!

अब जियें या मरें,

है बस यही अरमान,

कि जियूं तो उसके लिए,

मरूं तो उसके लिए,

ये जान न्योछावर हो

बस अब उसी के लिए!

जिसने सांस लेना सिखलाया,

हर एक सांस अब 

बस उसी के लिए!

संसार की दौलत से परे

जिसने रूह का ख़ज़ाना खुलवाया,

बेबसी और तानों से निकाल कर

जिसने आज़ादी का सपना दिखलाया,

बंद आंखों में भी जिसने

ख़ुदा का नूर छलकाया,

अब और ये न खता हो,

कि उसे छोड़ जाऊं मैं!

कि उसे छोड़ कभी न जाऊं मैं!

जिसने खुद के पहचान से परे

खुद की कीमत समझाया,

जिसने अपनापन के रिश्तों से बढ़कर

खुद में जो ख़ुदा है,

उससे नाता जुड़वाया,

जिसने अपनी ही गहराइयों में छिपे

खुशी और रौशनी का रास्ता दिखलाया,

अब यहां यह धड़कता जीवन भी

बस उसी का नज़राना!

मेरे मालिक, मेरे मौला,

तूने इसको भी खींच लिया,

इस बेवकूफ अभागे को

भी तूने तिलिस्म दिखा दिया!

अब बस बाकी एक और चाहत है,

कि मुझे तू अपने में समा लेना,

फिर वापस जाने न देना,

बस अपने में समा लेना!

-- नयन

बुधवार, २१ अक्टूबर २०२०

कोयंबतूर

facing my demons

for ages I have kept running

away from the devils

that reside inside

my dark interiors

of camouflaged compulsions,

for ages I have found

safe gardens where

light does not reach the bottom

to show the shit, where

no one could ever peep

and see what lies hidden,

for ages I have been

troubled inside

with turbulence and nastiness,

but I have been able to

divert attention and kept going on,

for ages I have sought

pleasure in seclusion,

time and again

allowing the cycles to repeat,

basking in the comfort,

assuming no one knows,

for ages I have seen

my legs shaking

when it needed steadiness,

for the foundations

were continuously bitten by

my inner termites,

for ages my being

is being sucked

by a black hole -

self-created and self-nurtured,

and all I did was feeling guilty

after each recurrence,

but now I have decided

to pull down all walls,

cast away all shields,

and stand there

naked under the Sun!

let the fire of a colossal star,

bigger than a thousand black holes,

burn my inner impurities,

light up the eternal pyre, and

chastity me of my hesitation and guilt!

no more now

shall I run away,

no more now

shall I hide,

no more now

shall I fear,

I am now open 

to facing all my demons!

-- nayan

Tue, 13th Oct 2020

Coimbatore

(image source: https://journeyintodreams.com/demon-dream-meaning)

wondering when wisdom shall prevail

what can you do?

there is nothing to be done.

just you can be...

in the sunlight you look for the moon,

in the night sky you don't see the firefly,

and such a huge mountain hides from your eyes...

what is seen, and what is unseen,

what is the line that separates them?

or is it just the inability to see...

water will anyways flow down the hill,

what else needed to have it's presence felt?

and still we stand thirsty...

cursing the creation when things go wrong,

and bursting into partying when we get what we want,

ups and downs continues to torment...

flower blossoms nourishing from the earth,

butterfly dances, tasting it's nectar,

and to the same earth they merge back...

we come, then act our way on the stage,

with sorrow or joy, knowingly or otherwise,

and then we go, when the curtain falls...

this dance, this melody, this poetry of life,

or a songless, unrhythmic prose of boredom and strife,

this choice, this election vote remains uncasted...

the urge to act, the impulse to react, and a brainless race,

have come with consequences gift-wrapped,

wondering when wisdom shall prevail...

-- nayan

Sat, 10th Oct 2020

Coimbatore

(image source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/alicepopkorn/2766737671)